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Tuesday, October 10th, 2006
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2:09 am - AHHHHHH
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So.
I'm super happy.
And i'm not going to let my brain convince me otherwise.
<333
O rly?
YA RLY!
NO WAI!!!!!
YAH WEH!
Wait.
Oro?
XD
<3
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(comment on this)
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| Monday, October 2nd, 2006
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12:23 pm - And in this darkness, I find that I have no inner light....
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*sigh*
It's been an hour and 13 minutes since I woke up.
An hour and 13 minutes since I was given absolution, the Gods of my subconcious granting me peace....
An hour and 13 minutes since the nightmare ended.
I haven't had a dream.... a... "nightmare" .... in quite a while. And perhaps, I don't have nightmares all that often...
But it's always the nightmares we remember.
It's always the nightmares I remember.
It's been a while since I've been this disturbed by a dream.
I keep telling myself... it's just a dream.... it's just a dream.
But these things in my head... can they really be... just dreams?
I wasn't at fault in this dream... or perhaps, I had convinced myself that I didn't deserve or recieve the blame...
But somethings never quite leave your mind.
The feelings of betrayal...
Loss...
Abandonment...
Loneliness.
And my console, my shrink, the oasis of my soul, my friend, is now in class.
So I find no rest, nor reprieve, from my inner demons...
Are they truely demons? Or merely harbringers of truth?
And if I already believe myself to be... a demon, in my own sort.
Does that make them normal?
Does it mean that I ... deserve this?
Or is this all just a reverie, leading me to false hopes, dreams, life even...
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, September 21st, 2006
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12:12 am - Finger Flick of Doom
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| Wednesday, September 13th, 2006
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3:33 am - Brief synopsis.
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Today was....
Fairly hilarious.
I'm far to tired to go into detail.
Lets just leave a breif synopsis.
Umbrella and bicycle.
Soaked ass.
Pigs blood.
Napping.
Frosty balls.
Halo calamity.
Eh....
That's it.
I'm done.
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, September 6th, 2006
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3:45 pm - "I find myself liking you. I really hate that"
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Ironically, I'm listening to a song about drunken calling.
It's actually a really good song....
I <3 trocadero.
So here's my tri-daily, semi-weekly, fairly annualy, rantation update.
So I've been dreaming a lot.
I just haven't been remembering them.
Isn't it strange when you have a dream so vivid and real that it seems.... Well. Real.
But just like a painting out in the rain, as soon as reality comes back, the painting fades away, washed out by the clutter of everyday life.
I've been having these dreams. I can't remember them. Well... I remember them. But only at certain points.
I've been dreaming a few times a week I guess. And no matter how strange the dream starts out (and trust me, they start strange), it always seems to end the same way. These same series of events... that I can't for the life of me recall. And it's important. It's not insignificant. It's something that i'm supposed to remember. It's something that....
But I suppose it's pointless to speculate something locked away in my subconcious. I've even tried to just.... pry into my own brain to get at the secrets. I think i'm going to try some meditation after I do some homework.
Also, I think I should do homework. Apparently, the teacher assigns us homework without telling us, and then we're just supposed to... well. Do it.
Also, I've been neglecting my reading. I didn't go to the recitations in class today. I don't think they are mandatory but... wait. Why would we have quizes in them if they weren't mandatory? ... ><
Well I didn't wake up in time for it anyways.
Somebody please bitchslap me into action.
This is a really mellow song.
Vale Deah - Trocadero.
I really like it, I really do.
My RA thought I was a choir boy because I was listening to Cowboy Bebop LIVE blasting on my surround sound. *shrug* I thought it was hilarious and awesome so feh.
Oh! Going to be starting an online comic/manga with Caroline. Pretty awesome ne? What is it going to be about? Eh. You know. Everything. Nothing. Zombies. Shun. What all good webcomics are about. I call it a webcomic simply because we're posting it... well. On the web. But it's probably going to be done in more of a manga-esque style. Then again, I have no idea how Caroline is going to draw it so... Yes, that's right. I'm not drawing. Guess that was a big suprise? XD. Nah, I am the scripter extrodinaire, as well as a... well. I was going to say protagonist. But. Well. You know. That's not so much my style. XD
I really want to do this. It's something that I've wanted to do for a while. Also, if it's alright with Caroline, methinks some side story (kinda like Circuity in MT) might be popping up. A chance to put my semi-useless, mostly awful, fictional only, writing abilities may come into use. So yeah, if there are inconsistancies in the story... Blame me, not her. *sigh* Although writing a story is... well. A bit different from doing a webcomic. It's not something that you are going to see the big picture of. A lot of it is going to be short, nearfarsighted (wait that's where you can only see close up right?), and hopefully humorful or profound or wherever we decide to take it... but then again. I don't really have the attention span for a long story. Do i? I have no idea, I guess that's why this is going to be interesting... and so freaking crazy.
Not to mention... Well. Whatever. That doesn't have to do with the... er.. Comic. Persay.
*cough*
Moving on.
Super mellow tastic.
FAULT!
I'm watching the US open.. well. Halfheartedly. It's on, but I've got Trocadero up, and the tv's muted, so. *shrug*
People are growing up. I'm growing up. I need to shape up.
I need a job.
No, this isn't going to turn into a depressed rant. I've given up on those... Er. Hopefully. lol.
I started reading Children of the Mind today. Again. It's such a good... profound book. I think I will say that Children of the Mind is my, in fact, favorite book. I lost it the first day I went to Calc class. I left it underneathe the desk. It showed up a week later. I'm so glad I got it back. It's... my old, favorite, stolen copy. My real only copy, but it's just so worn and used that I love it beyond belief. It's where I got the quote that serves as a title for this rant. Who cares if it has mostly nothing to do with what this rant is about.
"I find myself liking you. I really hate that."
Story of my life.
I really need to find a library. Or the school library. I swear, this school is freaking ridiculous. It's huge. So huge. But I guess 38,000+ students will do that.
So I bought some threadless Tees. They finally arrived. I'll be posting them on my facebook when I wear them. I'll just like. Do a photo shoot. XD
Also, I ordered some stuff from mega gear... Some stickers for my 1337 box laptop (already put a threadless sticker on there XD), a mug (I have nothing to drink my tea out of, and pouring boiling water in to plastic bottles is a bad idea. I learned the hard way, 3 melted plastic bottles and a steam burn later). Also, since my hair is getting long and difficult, I bought a bandanna. Yes. The power bandanna. I'm going to be awesomely dressed. Also, I have enough threadless/megatokyo gear for me to go an entire week. XDDD
I love it. In fact, i'm wearing my old "Strangers with Candy" shirt as we speak. I really ought to shower though.
Homework first methinks...
So, I'm going to wrap this up quickly.
*ABRUPT ENDING!*
Ha, not that quickly.
In essence: Dreams, longing, reading, buying, lack of money, class work, 4 clubs, and in the midst of it all... I'm trying to find out...
*ABRUPT ENDING!*
Seriously.
current mood:  drained
current music: Midnight Show - The Killers
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(comment on this)
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| Sunday, September 3rd, 2006
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11:27 pm
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The other day, I saw a squirrel eating a baby squirrel.
No joke.
It's neck was broken, and it was feasting on it's flesh. I walked up to it, and it grabbed it and ran off.
Stranger things, I have yet to see.
I realized I suck at bowling.
Met some cool epeople though.
Threadless Tee's came in! I have to pick them up, because the mailroom was closed when i got to it this weekend....
I'll get em tommorow.
And look super kick ass.
Mmmm...
I'm just about to watch Land of the Dead.
W00t!
I <3 zombies.
This weekend has been fairly un-eventful.
It hasn't been bad, it just hasn't been... eh. Great.
Actually, certain parts were good.
I got to talk to k-chan, and that was good.
I miss people.
XDDD
"Side effects may include I JUST KICKED YOUR ASS"
I love Robot Chicken.
Um.... where was I?
So easily distracted.
I figured I should update this.
I am far too mentally exauhsted to rant.
Em....
I'm sure there was something I was going to say.
Oh.
So me and this girl were talking about this (at the bowling alley, she beat me. ><)
Why is it that girl's tak about their ex's and what not? To make us feel jealous? Yes, I'd feel jealous, but I don't want to come off as the jealous bastard that I am, because... well. Then i'd be a jealous bastard.
It's not that I don't care! I just... don't want to be an ass hole.
But this girl tells me that i'm supposed to be the asshole?
Because the girl wants to know that you like her?
YOU"RE GOING OUT WITH THE GIRL/YOU"RE WITH HER!
Of course you like her!
Or she could at least ask. Geez.
o_O;;
So i guess i did rant.
But it was such a small rant!
Also, what is it with these people that I could swear are gay, but actually have girlfriends.
What's up with that.
And where are ALL THE GIRLS!?
Geez.
Alright, well.
You know.
Land of the Dead.
*sigh*
And what not.
I'm kinda lonely up here.
But.
*shrug*
What can you do?
I don't want to go out and socialize as much as I wanted to.
That's what happens when you get used, ne?
Stupid girls.
But, anime, tae kwon do, kendo, fencing.
Hey, I should be pretty pre-occupied.
w00t!
Just don't think too much about it, ne?
current mood:  discontent
current music: Vale Deah - Trocadero
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, August 22nd, 2006
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1:15 pm - w00t!
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Livejournal reinstated?
Methinks yes.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have renewed another one of your sources for voyeurism of your most favorite, or at least, most insane, azn.
For those of you who I don't know or don't like and didn't bother telling, or perhaps for the mentally challenged (i.e. people who don't like anime), I am currently in West Lafayette, Indiana, attending Purdue University.
Out in the middle of god damn no where.
But other than that, everything is just freaking peachy. I have another hour before my next class, and I've been just... sitting around for the past... 2 hours.
Jim Morrison? He seems like a pretty cool guy. Why am I talking about him? Because this girl is really likes him. Huh. Daniel's talking about a girl? You know what that means.
....
More misery, that's what it means.
I think, if possible, I've become even more cynical, especially with romance. Since I know absolutely no one, it's easier to talk to people, and meet new people, and yet... I continue to be an ass.
*sigh*
So much for keeping this emo-free.
*EMO FREE ZONE!*
By the way, my room is awesome. Really really really messy (I cleaned it last night, so it's a lot better), but seriously. I filled up a 80 gallon trashbag - you know the kind, the one they hide bodies in - with trash from the room. From being in the room for a week.
Seriously, we humans are incredibly foul. I honestly think we deserve to die off.
*punch*
Fine, so I don't think all of should die off. Just most of us. And by us, I mean you.
*punch*
It's hard not to be an asshole! Actually, more truthfully, it's so easy TO be an asshole.
I'm trying.
*punch*
Really!
*punch*
Me: What the fuck was that for?
Alter-Ego 1: I dunno. I just felt like it.
Me: Oh.
Alter-Ego 1: *punch!*
....
-_-;;
Yes
This actually goes through my mind.
Nice to meet you, I'm insane.
What was I talking about?
Nevermind
UPDATE!
So. Here's my life as I can remember it (recently, not the whole thing)
Friday, I didn't sleep, stayed up all night packing. Keenan, Will, and Kat all came over at 5 freaking AM and bade me farewell. It was nice. Daniel came a bit later. That was nice too. I really love those guys/girl.
Slept all the way up to Indiana, fell asleep when I got to the hotel. Woke up the next morning to find that I had slept for 21 hours and I was somehow still tired.
Moved in Saturday, went out and bought some more things, and moved in some more. Went out for dinner, spent the last night with my parents, and slept in the hotel.
Moved in Sunday. It was actually a lot easier saying goodbye than I thought. Maybe because I've been distancing myself from everyone already. I had already said my goodbyes, so we parted. Ran around, doing BGR stuff, and saw that Evolution of Dance guy! He actually did the stuff for us. It was insanely funny, and definetly awesome. Met a girl. Got drunk.
...
Etc.
Didn't do much else that week. Oh wait! I did happen to go to a Frat Party. That was... fairly interesting. I won't go into many details but it's safe to say that.... well. There wasn't anybody there with a BAC lower than ... 7. Not .07. I mean a straight up 7. Physically impossible, you say? You've obviously never met these frat boys.
I went to class yesterday, and this morning, and I've got class in another hour, but I really don't feel like it but.... well. I have to go. At least the first week, right?
I'm going to have to do homework as well. And somehow find time to play Halo.
Oh, but I've started to work out again!
And by start to work out, I mean do like a 100 push ups and then not do anything else. Man, sitting there doing laundry really gets you bored.
I've seemed to have degenerated in both thought and grammatical skill, but I'm listening to Wait Wait Don't Tell Me! and reading Shaman King. Which is semi-mindless, but it's really quite funny and good and my hair is almost long enough to be like Yoh's. Plus, I've got some big headphones. It's good stuff.
Well I was going to leave a word to the wise, but I seem to have gone on and ranted a bit.
Anyways, this is my livejournal, new ranthaven, since I've destroyed my xanga for the most part.
Myspace is still up, and I putz around a bit.
Facebook is definetly big for me now, especially with all the pictures I'm taking.
Oh, by the way.....
SNAKES ON A PLANE! Holy living mother of fuck, what a great movie. No seriously, it was incredible. I wasn't expecting anything, but it was so great.
And the line I love to hear outside of the theatre....
"So... Snakes on a Plane? ... What's it about?"
XD
Farewell, my dear stalkers. I leave you with these wise words.
"I've had it with these motherfuckin' snakes on this motherfuckin' plane!"
DJ Ham, signing off.
current mood:  listless
current music: Wait Wait, Don't Tell Me!
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